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SUBMITTED BY RUSS SCARVELLI
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While walking down the street
one day, a U.S. Senator is
tragically hit by a truck and
dies. His soul arrives in
heaven and is met by St. Peter
at the entrance.

"Welcome To Heaven" says St.
Peter. "Before you settle in,
it seems there is a problem.
We seldom see a high official
around these parts, you see,
so we're not sure what to do
with you."

"No problem, just let me in"
says the man.

"Well I'd like to, but I have
orders from higher up. What
we'll do is have you spend
one day in hell and one in
heaven. Then you can choose
where to spend eternity".

"Really, I've made up my mind.
I want to be in heaven" says the
Senator.

"I'm sorry but we have our
rules" says St. Peter.

And with that, St. Peter escorts
him to the elevator and
he goes down, down, down to hell.
The doors open and he finds
himself in the middle of a
green golf course. In the distance
is a clubhouse and standing in
front of it are all his friends
and other politicians who had
worked with him.

Everyone is very happy and
in evening dress. They run
to greet him, shakes his hand,
and reminisce about the good
times they had while getting
rich at the expense of other
people.

They play a friendly game of golf
and then dine on lobster, caviar,
and champagne.

Also present is the Devil, who
really is a very friendly guy
who has a good time dancing
and telling jokes. They are
having such a good time that
before he realizes it, it is
time to go.

Everyone gives him a hearty
farewell and waves goodbye
as the elevator rises......

The elevator goes up, up, up
and the door reopens at Heaven
where St. Peter is waiting for
him.

"Now it's time to visit heaven"
says St. Peter.

So 24 hours passes with the
Senator joining a group of
contented souls moving from
cloud to cloud, playing the
harp and singing. They have
a good time and before he
realizes it, the 24 hours
have gone by and St. Peter
returns.

"Well then, you've spent a day
in Hell and another in Heaven.
Now choose your eternity."

The Senator reflects for a
minute, then he answers:
"Well, I would never have
said it before, I mean Heaven
is delightful, but I think I
would be better off in Hell."

So St. Peter escorts him to the
elevator and he goes down, down,
down to Hell.

Now the doors of the elevator
open and he's in the middle of
a barren land covered with waste
and garbage. He sees all his
friends dressed in rags, picking
up the trash and putting it
in black bags as more trash falls
from above.

The Devil comes over to him
and puts his arm around his
shoulder: "I don't understand,"
stammers the Senator. "Yesterday
I was here and there was a golf
course and clubhouse and we ate
lobster and caviar, and drank
champagne and danced and had a
great time! Now there's just a
wasteland full of garbage and
my friends look miserable. What
happened??

The Devil looks at him, smiles,
and says: "Yesterday we were
campaigning......today you voted!!"